defying gravity

1. Speed Of Light

2. Marry Pizza

3. Fools

4. Lovespy

5. Electric Fantasy

6. Copycat

7. When I'm Alone

8. #slumberparty

9. Until You Hate Me

10. Cold As Ice

11. Much Better Than This

12. Tokyo Street Lights

13. We Can Fly

14. Mugshot

Preparations for "Defying Gravity" were quite heartbreaking in a way, as my computer crashed in December 2017 and I lost all of my master recordings. That meant I couldn't keep editing my own songs because I no longer had vocals and instruments as separated elements, I just had partially finished songs after the initial arrangement I work on while recording each track. Prior to releasing an album I always continue the arrangement and mastering process for each song, but accepting the loss of all those files took me a few months to process, which felt like a dark time as I had no motivation at all to keep making music.

However, around April 2018 I thought the least I could do was releasing the songs I had already created even if I couldn't arrange them better, so I listed all my tracks and split them into what would be a 4-album project, and after that I'd simply give up on music and stop making songs. "Defying Gravity" was the first album of the project but after a few months I started making new songs again, so I eventually scrapped that idea, and I never released the other albums nor any of the songs I had created prior to my computer crashing, which means there are around 70 songs I recorded during 2016 and 2017 that'll probably never see the light.

The first track is "Speed Of Light", which is a pop song with experimental elements such as glitched melodies and distorted sounds, and it has a pretty uncommon structure, containing only 2 choruses and a bridge section that comes right after the 2nd verse. The lyrics discuss being in denial about who we love until it hits us at the speed of light, as the title suggests. It's a song about feeling love in a way that it makes you feel like the best version of yourself, and about embracing that kind of feeling.

I chose "Marry Pizza" as a title for the next song because, despite sounding silly, the lyrics have such a deeper meaning about feeling stuck in a relationship with an unappreciative and selfish lover. I mean, I assume marrying a slice of pizza might be illegal, but the fact that you'd rather marry a pizza rather than staying in such an unsatisfactory relationship was a cool topic to write about. Music-wise it's influenced by music from the 80s, and it included voice synthesizers asking wedding-like questions I could answer "yes I do!" to effusively.

"Fools" comes next, and with such a strong influence by tropical house and the use of catchy melodies made with high-pitched vocals, it's definitely the kind of song you'd enjoy listening to at a summer party. The lyrics talk about how sometimes you want the person you like to tell you how much they like you back because, as the chorus says, it will mean you're not falling just like a fool.

The next track, called "Lovespy", follows the idea of a sultry role-play through its lyrics, and it's got a cool retro vibe with a strong disco feel to it. At first I created this song as a side project making the vocals with software Vocaloid, but I thought it was such a catchy track I eventually recorded it myself. I actually created many other songs besides this one for that project, as it was a time when I let hate comments really get to me and I thought not using my voice would make people like my songs better, but I also felt sad about not recording those songs myself, so in the end I never carried out that project and recorded them with my own vocals anyway.

For "Electric Fantasy", rather than creating the vocals using software Vocaloid, I took inspiration from existing Vocaloid songs to make this powerful-sounding EDM track that features the bass as the main element, and it also includes heavy autotune effects to create a futuristic atmosphere. The lyrics discuss stressful daily life events such as feeling unmotivated or having a boring day, and how we can fantasize about something else to escape from that reality.

"Copycat" is a K-pop inspired hip-hop song with a strong beat that makes you want to dance. The music's got a bit of an aggressive feel to it, but in the end it's a song about an old friend I used to have who eventually became obsessed with me and wanted to bring me down by all means, up to the point of posting hate comments about me on social media and even blackmailing their own family into hitting the dislike button on my YouTube videos (if you noticed how I said "crazy b**ch" a couple times in the song, now you know the lyrics were inspired by an actual crazy b**ch), so I like that it sounds aggressive because it truly represents how I felt creating this track.

I mixed a few genres while creating "When I'm Alone", as I took inspiration from EDM, hip-hop, dubstep and even future bass. I wanted it to sound dark and eerie, but also catchy, so I got creative when mixing the vocals to make them stand out. The lyrics talk about feeling trapped but not necessarily in a love relationship, as it could be trapped in a job, in a bad habit or even in a relationship with a family member, so I used the lyrics to describe how good it feels to break free and finally be alone.

I used a really cool electric guitar sample on this song that reminded me of Katy Perry's Teenage Dream era, so I created "#slumberparty" with the idea of being not only a great song to play at a slumber party, but also as catchy as Katy Perry's songs from that album. Therefore, as you can expect the lyrics talk about having fun at a slumber party, picturing myself with friends playing video games, dancing or even singing all night long, and it was such an easy song to write because that has happened a few times and it was super fun!

"Until You Hate Me" is a future bass-influenced song that musically represents darkness, despair and loneliness, including interesting elements such as distorted guitar chords and a melody inspired by Chinese folk music. The lyrics follow the same theme, and the line "I'm going to love you until you hate me" feels particularly powerful and meaningful, because it expresses not only the idea of being there for everyone while feeling like no one is there for you, but also the fear of becoming more and more disliked by others as they get to know you.

I think tropical house songs often sound catchy and cheerful, but for "Cold As Ice" I wanted to take the inspiration to a darker atmosphere. I sang the verses in a low register, which is a nice contrast to the powerful chorus, and the lyrics talk about not showing who you really are to others, depicting both a lack of interest from other people and also inability to express yourself.

I mixed different styles in "Much Better Than This", as it's a pop song with a hip-hop beat that leads the chorus and an indie pop-influenced hook section that includes marching band instruments and brass elements following an American high school concept. It's a song that talks about being yourself in the most natural and realistic way, accepting who you are and being surrounded by people who appreciate you for who you are.